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Today was the Edmonton Slutwalk event, an event very near and dear to my heart.
For those who don't know the history of this event, it was started in Toronto in 2011 when a police officer said, "women should avoid dressing like sluts in order not to be victimized." This statement, especially coming from a police officer who is supposed to protect victims of crimes, created an outrage. From this outrage came slutwalk, a way to fight back against this victim blaming mentality. Not only did the above comment shame many survivors for their sexuality, it also silenced many more. Sexual assault doesn't just occur when a female is wearing a short skirt and a halter-top, it can happen right at home when a person is wearing flannel pajamas. Sexual assault knows no limits and follows no rules; it could happen to anyone regardless of sex, gender, race, ability, class, education, profession, or experience. A flippant comment from a police officer perpetuated a myth that sexual assault only happens to certain types of people: women who dress like "sluts". In reality, sexual assault doesn't depend upon what someone is wearing, how late they are out, or how much they've had to drink. Unfortunately, statements like the one discussed here are far from uncommon and that is why the slutwalk event spread internationally very quickly. Sexual assault is one of the most unreported crimes and when someone from the police force makes a victim blaming comment like this, sadly it gives survivors even more reason to stay silent for fear of blame, being shamed or not being believed. This type of harmful mentality that survivors of sexual assault are to blame for what happened to them is so detrimental to survivors and unfortunately is rampant in our culture.
The Canadian Women's Foundation published a statistic which states that only about 10% of all sexual assaults in Canada are reported to police. There is a vast amount of research showing that victim blaming is one of the contributing factors in this alarmingly small reporting rate. I was silent for years after my assault because I was taught that I was to blame for what happened to me and because of this I was too ashamed to tell my story. It took many years to eradicate this thinking from my mind (and to be honest, sometimes I still struggle with that). Because of how society told me I was to blame for what happened, I didn't go to the police. I didn't report what happened to me and the person that raped me is still out there, freely. Now think about my story, and imagine how many others are sitting in silence like I was, feeling the same shame. This needs to end because survivors have been though enough!
Lets take a minute to compare rape culture to the issue of drunk driving (just keep reading, I swear it will make sense). If a drunk driver hits a pedestrian and injures/kills them, we as a society blame the driver that got behind the wheel, not the pedestrian crossing the street. We don't teach others to not walk outside during the night/early morning because there is a likelihood that there will be drunk drivers on the road. We don't blame the individual who got struck by a drunk driver while legally crossing the street near the stadium after a hockey game. So why isn't this the case when we are talking about rape? We teach girls to not walk down dark alleyways, we teach girls to never leave a drink unattended at a bar, we teach girls to avoid dressing in shorts and a tank top during the summer, etc. So why aren't we teaching boys not to rape? Why does the burden of blame continue to fall on the survivors instead of the perpetrators?
The 'why' has a lot to do with rape culture. Rape culture is the attitude in our culture that normalizes, excuses, tolerates and even condones rape and sexual assault. We see rape culture all around us, every day. We see it when someone makes a rape joke, we see it when someone says "I totally raped them" when referring to the fact that they beat someone else in a video game. We see rape culture in billboards and ads that sexually objectify women, we hear it every time Robin Thicke's "Blurred Lines" comes on the radio. Rape culture is very alive and the impact this has on survivors is heartbreaking. This is why I will chant from the rooftop that "Yes means Yes, No means No!". I will shout "Whatever we wear, where ever we go". Please join me because it's time to rally around survivors and say "NO MORE victim blaming!"